overcoming fear

Part of our individual as well as collective evolution and maturing is in learning to meet, face and transcend the fears we have either inherited, been conditioned with, or developed over the years.

Some of these may include the fear of disapproval, physical harm, confrontation, relationships, not being good enough, aging, being judged, not meeting self-imposed or others’ expectations, of being seen, of not being seen, of trying new things, of change, of failing, of succeeding, of being alone, living, dying, losing our loved ones and so much else, including irrational phobias and reasonless feelings of dread.

Fear gets triggered up within us either by our own thoughts or a comment or action by another. Having never been taught how to deal with fear as it arises, there is a tendency more often than not, to repress, resist or even deny it by distracting ourselves – and then believing that our fear has been resolved or overcome.

Unfortunately, this is only a very temporary solution. Sooner or later the same fear gets triggered up again, offering yet another opportunity to fully embrace what is present, as uncomfortable as it may be, in order to finally and truly transcend its limiting and sometimes devastating stranglehold on our lives.

We develop and maintain a self-destructive habit of avoiding anything that creates a disturbance within us, fear being the ultimate discomfort. Without realising it, we begin to make all our decisions, small or large, based on a foundation of insecurity and an inability to face our own feelings.

So what do we do when fear arises. What we DO NOT need to do is to engage with the trigger of our rising fear. Neither the inner thoughts nor the outer opinion or action is the actual cause of our fear. We need to recognise that the fear was already here, buried within by our very selves over a long period of time.

The trigger is not our enemy but a gift, an ally, that can help to liberate us from a contracting experience in our past that has left behind residual energies that we still need to deal with.

When they come up, every one of our fears holds within it the opportunity to be free of it. All we need do is to open up to that opening.



Take a deep breath into your agitation, bringing your entire attention to it. You will find that the energy of your fear can be pinpointed to a specific location in your body. It may reveal itself as a feeling of heaviness or a contraction or some other unwelcome sensation.

With your attention softly centred on that feeling, begin to breathe gently into it.

Inhale slowly and deeply. Pause to allow the fresh energy coming in to bring expansion to the dense energy of your fear.

Then exhale, allowing the stale old heavy energy present to free up.

Pause again to allow a moment of emptiness before you take the next breath of fresh energy.

Remember, you are the awareness that is present. Observe the breath and its gift of spaciousness, it will create an expansion and release of the energies long awaiting liberation.

Allow the breath of life, of light, of love to do what it does best – bringing life, light and love to the dark heavy tight places in you.

Soon you will no longer sense anything other than a lightness and upliftment in your being.

As you settle into this peaceful state, your response to whatever is present will transmit your inner equanimity into the outer world as a blessing and a service.

Posted by Sa Silvano on 14th September 2018

  • Tony Deighton
    Posted at 23:10h, 25 September

    Everytime you discuss a fear it loses a little power over your being. Similar to peeling away a layer of onion, the more often you do it, the less tears get shed until you finally own the fear and are then able to use that fear you once had to enable others to shed their layers. To gift with love is the greatest gifting one can do. Namaste

    • Sa Silvano
      Posted at 11:37h, 27 September

      Thank you for your comment. I would like to take this opportunity to respond to it.
      Talking about your fears may offer a temporary relief, and the more you talk about it, the more it feels as though you are actually releasing its energy.
      However, fears are created in the mind and the mind loves to ponder on its own creation. So rather than releasing, all we are doing is changing the story in the mind and not dealing with the underlying energy. This gets pushed down deep within us till we become completely unconscious of its presence.
      We remain oblivious to these energies until one day, something is said or something happens, and these old buried fears are instantly triggered and reactivated. These are the very same fears we believed we had dealt with years ago by talking and talking about them till they no longer seemed to bother us.
      It is not wrong to share our story, it can indeed be a relief to share it so we can hear it ourselves and feel it. If we keep retelling it, however, all we are doing is indulging it till even we become bored with it.
      If we want to be completely free of our fears, we need to get past the narrative, which is useful in so far as to point to where the energy actually is.
      Once we have identified where the energy is being held – and we will feel this in some part (or parts) of our body – then we can come into open hearted acceptance of that which is present. Using the breath to bring about relaxation and spaciousness and allowing the hard stuck energy to loosen up and finally release.